There's an APP for that

Conservatives reflexively shout "MUNICH!" or "APPEASEMENT!" or "NEVILLE CHAMBERLAIN!" whenever a politician suggests not giving the neocon warmongers everything they want. Latest example. (Good rebuttal.)

That example came from Bill Kristol, one of the guys who talked this country into the Iraq invasion. If we lived in a sane world, Congress would pass a law forbidding this jerk from ever putting his lying lips within 50 feet of an open mic.

On the domestic front, political cliche aficionados will also want to savor what Jeb Bush recently told Iowans. Prepare for a shock: Jeb says that he intends to "change the culture in Washington."

Now is time for a new approach: It starts by cutting off the oxygen to Mount Washington — the tax-spend-and-borrow culture of Washington.

(A Bush complaining about government borrowing. It's so cute!)

Obviously, Bush and Kristol have given up on the very concept of saying anything original. That is why I believe that a software developer should concoct a new app designed to create a political speech of modest length, filled entirely with familiar guff that we can all easily tune out.

Call it the APP app. APP = Automated Political Pablum.

The models would be SciGen, a website which automatically generates "scientific" papers (complete with authentic-seeming citations) that have passed for the real thing. We also have a site which automatically creates a scholarly paper on postmodernism as well as a program that generates adorably awful adolescent poetry.

Maybe APP already exists. Maybe Jeb is using it. Maybe Hillary is using APP Blue.